Four-legged ducks

by rjs
Categories: From the book Extraordinary Adventures
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Published on: October 27, 2014
A Mullah Nasruddin / Nasreddin Hoca story

 

Four-legged ducks

Mullah Nasruddin
Mullah Nasruddin

One day Mullah Nasruddin was preaching in the mosque, and while he spoke, he became annoyed and then angry because he saw that some members of the congregation were yawning — some of them had even nodded off to sleep.
He paused, then began to talk loudly, “Recently I was taking a stroll down by the river, when I happened to see four-legged ducks drinking coffee.”
When the people heard the phrase “four-legged ducks,” their eyes opened, their ears pricked up, and their jaws dropped. Now they began to listen very carefully to the Mullah.
This made him even angrier, yelling at the congregation, “Why are you here, Muslims‽ The whole time I’m giving a thoughtful and impassioned sermon about some aspect of the Truth, and every single one of you falls asleep. But the moment I pull a whopper of a lie out of my ass, you all awaken and pay rapt attention.”

 

Excerpted from

Extraordinary Adventures of Mullah Nasruddin
by Ron J. Suresha

now in print from Lethe Press

~

 

 


A proper bird

by rjs
Categories: From the book Extraordinary Adventures
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Published on: October 13, 2014
A Mullah Nasruddin / Nasreddin Hoca story

 

A proper bird

Mullah Nasruddin
Mullah Nasruddin

One day in the market, Mullah Nasruddin came across a vendor selling exotic birds of various sorts, including a stork. Mullah had never seen this sort of bird before. He bought one of these peculiar long-legged, long-beaked birds at the market, and brought him home.

When he returned home, he set the bird down on a table and got out a cage he had which previously held two pigeons. Nasruddin looked at the new bird critically, and realized that it would never fit in its cage. The proportions were all off. “You poor thing,” he sighed, “how did you ever grow into this wretched state‽”

So he took a knife and trimmed the stork’s beak and legs down to what looked like the right length. Then he put the stork in his cage and said, “Well, now not only do you finally fit, at least you look like a proper bird!”

 

Excerpted from

Extraordinary Adventures of Mullah Nasruddin
by Ron J. Suresha

now in print from Lethe Press

~

 

 


Cow or donkey?

by rjs
Categories: From the book Extraordinary Adventures
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Published on: October 6, 2014
A Mullah Nasruddin / Nasreddin Hoca story

 

Cow or donkey?

Mullah Nasruddin
Mullah Nasruddin

One day, Fatima wanted milk for their children, so she nagged her husband, Mullah Nasruddin, to get a cow so they might have a steady source on hand.

“My dear,” countered Nasruddin, “I would gladly obtain for us a cow, but there is simply no room in the stable for one. It’s just large enough for my little donkey, Karakacan, and I want her to be comfortable.”

The donkey’s comfort, or lack thereof, hardly seemed rationale enough to avoid getting a cow, so Fatima pressed her husband with her request until finally he relented. He threw his leg over Karakacan’s back and rode to market and, after considerable deliberation and bargaining, he chose a healthy-looking bovine and led her home.

Nasruddin was still sure that his donkey would suffer greatly, so he took the time on his way home with the cow to acquaint Allah with his predicament. He knelt on his prayer rug and, after bowing his head, he turned up his hands in appeal to the Almighty.

“Oh Allah,” Mullah prayed, “Thou know that I love my little grey donkey, and that she won’t be at ease with a cow in the same stable. Dear Allah, if it be Thy will, please take the life of my cow, that my beloved little gray donkey, Karakacan, will be at peace.” Having left the matter in God’s hands, Nasruddin returned home, stabled and fed both animals, and went about the rest of his affairs.

The next morning, Mullah scurried out to the stable to see how his donkey managed overnight. To his shock, he found Karakacan had fallen down dead. “Ai vai,” he wailed, heartbroken at the loss of his longtime friend.

Fatima, hearing his cries, ran to the window and called out, “Mullah, what is the matter?”

“It is nothing,” Nasruddin muttered, then added under his breath bitterly, “nothing but my dear little donkey.”

After Fatima closed the window, Nasruddin fell to his knees once again in supplication to God. “Oh Allah, Thou art all-knowing and all-powerful. But can Thou not tell the basic difference between a cow and a donkey‽”

 

Excerpted from

Extraordinary Adventures of Mullah Nasruddin
by Ron J. Suresha

now in print from Lethe Press

~

 

 


Hot couture

by rjs
Categories: From the book Extraordinary Adventures
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Published on: September 29, 2014
A Mullah Nasruddin / Nasreddin Hoca story

 

Hot couture

Mullah Nasruddin
Mullah Nasruddin

One swelteringly hot day at the chai shop, Mullah and the wags were discussing distant lands. Faik declared, “There are some places where it so hot that the most people go around completely naked.”

Nasruddin asked, “Without clothes, how in the world do they tell the women from the men?”

 

 

Excerpted from

Extraordinary Adventures of Mullah Nasruddin
by Ron J. Suresha

now in print from Lethe Press

~

 

 


Short-term commitment

by rjs
Categories: From the book Extraordinary Adventures, From the book Uncommon Sense
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Published on: September 22, 2014
A Mullah Nasruddin / Nasreddin Hoca story

 

Short-term commitment

Mullah Nasruddin
Mullah Nasruddin

One day in the chai shop, Mali asked Nasruddin, “Why is it that you never speak your wife’s name?”

“Because I have no idea what it is,” said the Mullah.

“What‽ How long have you been married?”

“We’ve been married maybe twenty years, give or take a few.”

Jafar asked, “Mullah, you’re married now for two decades and you don’t know your wife’s name‽”

Nasruddin said, “When we were wed, by our parents’ arrangement, I had no intention of making a go at the marriage, so why should I learn her name?”

Mali said, “It’s Fatima, you dolt. You really can’t remember the year you married Fatima, your wife?”

“To tell the truth, I don’t remember exactly when we were wed,” Nasruddin replied. “As should be clear to you by now, it happened long before I had any sense whatsoever.”

 

Excerpted from

Extraordinary Adventures of Mullah Nasruddin
by Ron J. Suresha

now in print from Lethe Press

~

 

 


Ron reads “Nasruddin’s nail” from Extraordinary Adventures of Mullah Nasruddin

by rjs
Categories: From the book Extraordinary Adventures
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Published on: September 12, 2014

XNS coverSquareAuthor Ron Suresha reads the folk tale “Nasruddin’s nail” from his book, Extraordinary Adventures of Mullah Nasruddin

Afraid to miss it

by rjs
Categories: From the book Extraordinary Adventures, The Daily Nasruddin
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Published on: August 25, 2014
A Mullah Nasruddin / Nasreddin Hoca story

 

The Prophet’s Traditions

Mullah Nasruddin
Mullah Nasruddin

When one of young Nasruddin’s brothers died, his mother told him, “Go now and buy a shroud, and some balm!”

However, the boy replied, “I won’t go — send someone else!”

She asked him why he would not go. He said, “I’m afraid I’ll miss the funeral!”

 

Excerpted from

Extraordinary Adventures of Mullah Nasruddin
by Ron J. Suresha

forthcoming November 2014 from Lethe Press

 

 


Listen and laugh: Mullah Nasruddin audiobook available

by rjs
Categories: Announcements, From the book Uncommon Sense
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Published on: August 22, 2014
NSR Nasruddin audiobook cover rev
NSR Nasruddin audiobook cover rev

Listen and laugh!

Mullah Nasruddin audiobook available on Audible.com

narrated by Ted Brooks

The Uncommon Sense of the Immortal Mullah Nasruddin
Stories, jests, and donkey tales of the beloved Persian folk hero
by Ron J. Suresha

  *   An Anne Izard Storytellers’ Choice Award Winner
*   A Storytelling World Honor Book

Noted voice talent Ted Brooks captures the wit, wisdom and uncommon sense of humor of Mullah Nasruddin, the beloved folk character known in his native Turkey as Nasreddin Hoca and by other names throughout the Middle and Far East, in this award-winning, unabridged collection of more than 365 authentic stories and jokes.

Once, when Nasruddin was acting up in school by distracting his classmates with endless antics, jests, and donkey tales, his irate teacher cursed the boy: “Whatever you do or say, wherever you go or stay, whether it’s night or day — people will only laugh at you.” Now, eight centuries later, children, adults, and wise fools everywhere are still telling and laughing at Mullah stories.

This entertaining and insightful retelling brings the famed Persian legend into the 21st Century. Storytellers, folklorists, Sufis, comedians, wisdom seekers, and everyone who loves to laugh will be enriched and enlightened by the timeless wit and wisdom of Mullah Nasruddin.

Check out the audiobook of Uncommon Sense on Audible.com

  • Length: 7 hrs and 55 mins 
  • Format: Unabridged
  • $19.95 or Free with Membership
  • Lethe Press / Audible.com

 

 

Penitence

by rjs
Categories: From the book Extraordinary Adventures
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Published on: August 18, 2014
A Mullah Nasruddin / Nasreddin Hoca story

 

  Penitence

Mullah Nasruddin
Mullah Nasruddin

Nasruddin was a homely fellow with plain features, although his long scraggly beard did cover up a fair amount of ugliness. Once when he was in the market, a woman walked right up to him and stared at him with a cold, mean expression.
Nasruddin tried to ignore the woman but when after several minutes she had not stopped gawking at him, he confronted her, “What does this mean — that you fix your sight on me with such a severe look on your face?”
The woman answered, “I have committed a great sin with my eyes and wanted to repent, so I vowed that I had to look at something completely disgusting to atone. I’ve been searching for days, and I could not find anything more disgusting to look at than you.”

Excerpted from

Extraordinary Adventures of Mullah Nasruddin
by Ron J. Suresha

forthcoming November 2014 from Lethe Press

 

 


Turban is no strap

by rjs
Categories: From the book Extraordinary Adventures
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Published on: August 11, 2014
A Mullah Nasruddin / Nasreddin Hoca story

 

Turban is no strap

 

NSR Nasruddin audiobook cover rev
NSR Nasruddin audiobook cover rev

Once Mullah Nasruddin was plowing his field when the well-worn leather strap he used to tie the ox to the yoke broke. There was no way the animal could pull the plow this way, so he unwrapped the turban from his head and used that to hold the yoke, but soon enough that failed as well.

He pointed to his now dirty, mangled turban, and addressed it, saying, “All this time you’ve been so lazy, just sitting atop my head all day long. I’ll bet you never realized how hard the strap works, plowing the field, day after day. Now you get a taste of just how crappy it feels for the strap!”

 

Excerpted from

Extraordinary Adventures of Mullah Nasruddin
by Ron J. Suresha

forthcoming November 2014 from Lethe Press

 

 


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